Charlottesville: Hate is hate. There are no shades of gray.

S L O W . . . D O W N . . . and process this: “When both sides show up equipped to bust heads, there ain’t no good guys, there ain’t no bad guys. There’s just angry, violent assholes.” Credit to Marc MacYoung.

Trump was right. <<< Three words I have never uttered.

When he said, “We condemn in the strongest possible terms this egregious display of hatred, bigotry and violence on many sides,” he was right in that hatred, and the ensuing violence it can create, IS on many sides. Hate does not see sexuality, gender, age, religion, ethnicity or color. Hate is evil. Period. But people are playing semantics now. “Trump didn’t use the right phrase to call out the hate. He should have said it this way or that way.” But hate is the only word necessary. When discussing specific policies of the left or right, I frequently argue that there are many shades of gray to consider. That extremists exist in every political party who can distort a simple concept. But with hate, THERE IS NO GRAY. Hate does not discriminate.

But if we insist on defining hate in different ways for different people of varying sexuality, gender, religion, age, ethnicity or color, are we not expanding the divide between us? When Liberals yell “I told you so…own it, you racists” or when Conservatives refuse to acknowledge the truth of someone’s struggle (BLM, WhitePrivilege), doesn’t that keep us divided? Aren’t we hating each other MORE, even though we agree on the most basic tenants of life? That slavery is evil. Child abuse is evil. Rape and murder are evil.

So when someone shares the truth of their struggle, can we all slow down and listen? Return love, not dismissal? No matter your color? For well-meaning folks who misinterpret #WhitePrivilege as a means to devalue their own struggle through poverty or abandonment or abuse, that’s not what the term means. For well-meaning folks who think #BLM is the opposite of #BlueLivesMatter, slow down and listen. Challenges exist for all of us, no matter our sexuality, gender, religion, age, ethnicity or color, that no law can mitigate. I will not separate evil into less distinct shades of gray. So please slow down and listen, and consider what Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. said, “When evil men shout ugly words of hatred, good men must commit themselves to the glories of love.”

Thanks for listening to ME! I promise to return the courtesy.

Signed,

White mom to LGBT, half-Asian, lower middle class, first-generation American teenagers of a refugee, immigrant father.

P.S. What will I tell my kids about #Charlottesville? I will tell them that during the Perseid meteor shower the day after, I was alone and awake. And it was dark. And outside, a few stars were falling from the sky. And I watched them from afar and then stuck around to watch the sun rise and bathe the earth in light. And I will tell them that despite Charlottesville, there will always be falling stars whose light dies, but that there will also always be a sunrise. And I will tell them to stay the course. Empowerment through vigilance, not fear, my beautiful babies. And I will tell them to go light the world with love.